Advice to the Mothers
This past Sunday was Mother’s Day, and while there was a message on the important role of mothers, we also had a chance to hear Rachael Kaylor encourage mothers. Rachael is a member of our church with three grown children. She was asked to share her thoughts on the question: “What advice would you tell your younger self?” A transcript of her answer is below.
I would tell myself a lot of things. But I had to narrow it down somewhat. The first thing I would tell myself is don’t be so hard on yourself. You are going to make mistakes. You are not going to be perfect but we know who is perfect, and he cleans up messes, and I made a lot of messes. But I have three great kids who now are great parents themselves.
I would also get rid of the perfection infection. I don’t have to do everything right. And I am not going to do everything right. And my kids don’t expect it, and if they do that is their problem! The way you stay to this is to stay in the Scripture. I learned to memorize a couple Scriptures at a time and I would repeat them over and over. When you get into the Scripture the enemy doesn’t like that and he flees. That is a big part of the battle right there.
Next I would say be selective in who you go to for advice. I learned this through much angst and tears. I learned to be careful who I went to for advice. I didn’t go to the critics. There are always critics. I began to look for older and wiser women in the church and go to them for advice. They are a great source of encouragement and council.
I also learned to affirm my children’s father. I wished I had learned this really early on. I began to do this, and it really began to change things. I began to affirm their father, and do it out loud so they heard it. I would say, “You are so blessed to have the dad that you have. He really loves you. He is so good. He is a great provider.” It’s really powerful to affirm their father, and I saw a different attitude in me and also in my kids.
I would also pray out loud. I am a firm believer in what I call prayer walking. I go through my house and I let them hear me praying out loud. It brings such a sense of well being and peace. Not only in your children’s heart but in your heart too. It also gave me confidence that I can do this, and I can do this well. It doesn’t matter what other people think about me. Nobody can mother my children better than me. That is really important to realize.
And the last thing is to pray. Pray some more. And pray some more. Just keep praying. We can go to Jesus anytime we need and as often as we need. He never pushes us away.